Random Late Night Musings

Another frustrating day. I’m supposed to be going to the demo tomorrow, but it’s now 2 am, and I can’t sleep.
Talked to Grimmy about "the rumor" and its origins when he came over to get some potting soil, and although it didn’t really resolve anything, at least it felt good to get it off my chest. I’m trying to let go of my anger over the entire incident, but every time I give a little bit of it up, more seems to rush back in to fill its place. I can feel myself sliding down into a depression over this entire affair, and I feel as if I’m powerless to do anything about it.
I wish there was some way to wind back time, so I could go back and head this entire distance between Mags and myself off. My brain knows that we’re both to blame for the pickle we’re in, but my heart keeps fluctuating between totally blaming her and totally blaming myself.
It’s much to late, off to bed so I can stare at the ceiling some more. Eventually this will end, what scares me is that I have no idea where it’s all headed and I feel as if I’m caught up in an out of control ride.